Wednesday, 31 December 2008

The Best

I usually like to focus on the good on this blog, so I have decided to blog my favorites of this year. Only the best, none of the worst. Also cos I can't think of anything else to blog, and seems to be trend to do overview of 2008 in blogs.

Favorite Song: Kings of Leon - Closer
I first heard the Sex on Fire song on radio, and I thought it was good, but when I later saw Use Somebody on TV, I really wanted this album. So once I got it, I went about my usual way of listening to new stuff, which is to shove it in with everything else, and wait for it to come up on shuffle. When I heard Closer I instantly took to it, and hoped against hope that Telkom don't make an ad using it (Like they recently did with Travis' Closer)

Favorite Movie - The Dark Knight
I coulda been less cliche and said something else, the truth is this was the best movie I have seen this year. Heath deserves a posthumous Oscar, though I doubt Best Actor would come from a mainstream movie. My other 2 favorite movies of this year were Tropic Thunder and Pineapple Express. I hope James Franco gets an award for his performance in Pineapple Express as well.

Favorite Game - GTA IV
This was a tough one, but i think in terms of entertainment value, this was best game of the year, as well as cos it is the only 10/10 games I know. Sure there are faults but they are negligible.

Favorite Blog - saaleha.com
Saaleha has got her mojo back, maybe it is the marriage :) I also like my almost news blog, but that would be nepotism.

Favorite Post Of Mine - The Char Knight
It took me all of 15 mins to write and even though it might seem outdone, the whole indian humor thing, I really enjoyed it and find myself laughing at it even to this day. Another favorite post of mine was Chronicles of Arabiya.

Happy New Year Everyone.

Till next time in Waseem world.

Friday, 12 December 2008

Happy birthday Qdee





Happy birthday Qdee, one of the best friends I've met through blogging.

Till next time in Waseem World

Thursday, 11 December 2008

McKhathams

If you read my previous post (which I imagine most might not have, cos it was a while back), Harry Potter and the Esale-E-Sawaab, you would know I'm not a big fan of khathams. I have been for a few since that post and my opinion hasn't changed. I have become more cynical about the whole event in fact. Like what is the point of throwing rosewater during salaami? I don't see any purpose in it. Can someone perhaps help with a possible reason? I googled, I found nothing.

I think khathams would be alot more fun if they McDonaldise it. I got the idea from a recent MJ post where he mentioned McMarriage. I don't think a McMarriage would work though cos no bride would want a wedding in McDonalds, but khathams could work, cos they're mostly about food anyway. Your average McKhatham meal would be a choice between McKalia or McDhalghos, beverage would be either McJuice with leaves in it or McCheap Coke substitute, and rounded off (or started off) with my favorite McKheer or McSoji. The Happy Meals would be called Barakah Meals, and the free toy would be a tasbeeh, and also come with a small piece of chanamagaj/burfee.

Hmm, actually I don't see how the khatham would be more fun, except the eating part. Anyway...

Till next time in Waseem world

Monday, 1 December 2008

How to tell if your blogger friend is a stalker

While gift shopping yesterday, I found an awesome book entitled 'HOW TO TELL IF YOUR BOYFRIEND IS THE ANTICHRIST', and I would have bought it for the person I was gift shopping for except that the book cost about R140, which for a quirky 100 page book seemed pricey to me, nevertheless i enjoyed the little bits that I had managed to read. It had other tips also like 'How to tell if your boyfriend is an Extraterrestrial' and 'How to tell if your boyfriend is actually twins', and a number of others.

Here's an example of one:

HOW TO TELL IF YOUR BOYFRIEND
IS SUFFERING FROM AMNESIA

  • Surprisingly little baggage.
  • Simple name (i.e., Bob Spoon, Jack Jackson).
  • You found him wandering the streets with a bandage on his head.
  • Honestly perplexed about the origin of his tattoo.
  • Doesn’t think he’s ever loved like this before.

Should you break up with him?

Are you kidding? He’s a clean slate. You can dress him how you like, you choose all the movies, and he has no annoying friends or family. Jackpot! The only potential downsides are: (1) he could regain his memory, and with it, some control of the relationship; and (2) his family and/or friends may find and reclaim him. But they might not recognize him with the new makeover you gave him. Keep him while you can.


So I decided to do one of my own, but specialise it for blogs, I can only think of one at the moment, but I will add them on to my blog as I think of others.

I call it 'How to tell if your blogger friend is a ...'. My first entry will be

How to tell if your blogger friend is a stalker

  • He/She is always the first to comment on your post.
  • Your post is always the best thing he/she has read in their entire life (even if its pasted song lyrics)
  • Comments always contain 'Lol Thats so true', or 'Lol where do you come up with these.'
  • He/She has accosted you or invited you on facebook with the opening line 'Hey, aren't you that guy/girl with that blog , lol I love it.'
  • He/She takes personal offence to your non-posting.
  • He/She has your URL engraved on his/her arm.
Should you de-link them?

Well their blog is probably a homage to you anyway, but you should de-link them and then remove every manner of communication (address, email, cell number etc.) out of your blog. But there are probably gonna come to a blogmeet someday and snip of a piece of your hair and use it to help them sleep at night. Best idea would be to delete your blog and move over to wordpress with the penname Jose Antonio Goncalves (Maria for the girls).

Till next time in Waseem world.

Tuesday, 18 November 2008

Summer Of Our Discontent

It's raining. Again. I don't remember a time when it wasn't raining. This is probably the dreariest summer we have ever had. Normally I like the rain and cold, but it has gotten so bad that I am actually longing for the sun. Something we Durbanites have taken for granted and some of us, like me, even cursed it. For some reason the rain seems to come, interspersed with misery.

The worst of it was definitely last Friday. I was going to do an almost news on the storm, and personifying the storm as the Xmen character Storm, then I decided it was perhaps in poor taste, due to the fact the heavens truly opened for some unfortunate kids.

This post is un-Waseem-like. I don't care. It's still raining.

Till next time in Waseem world.

Wednesday, 5 November 2008

Ya Ayyahul Name Changes

We (Masood, MJ and I) were going home yesterday via North Coast Road, which has now changed names to Chris Hani Road, and Masood thought aloud "Why didn't they just change the name to animal names. Surely noone would have issue with Leopard Street." A good point, but I think the whole reason for the name change was to immortalise the names of people who were involved in the apartheid struggle. I could be wrong, cos I don't recognize half the names, but that could be due to my own limited knowledge on the apartheid struggle.

I have few issues with the name change, besides the confusing aspect, and non-acknowledgement of the new names, my main issue is the unnecessary amounts of money used for sign boards etc. The community would be better served by building more homeless shelters, or finding more ways to increase employment opportunities. A beggar doesn't care if he is begging at Florence Nzama or Prince Alfred.

Anyway I proffered to the guys, maybe we should get our streets to be sponsored, like change the name of West Street to Coca Cola Street. That way Coke can pay for all the name change costs and its good advertising for them (not that they need it). Masood said maybe then we will get some really rich guys sponsoring their own streets, like personalised numberplates. Eg. MO786 Avenue, 4U2NV Grove etc.

Another funny thing regarding the street name change, one Friday lecture, the lecturer was highlighting all the current the plight of the Muslims, and how it was a punishment for us due to us disobeying Allah. One of our current problems that he highlighted was the street name changes. Ok I know the street name changes are annoying, but I seriously doubt they are a punishment from Allah for our sinful ways. Allahu Alam

Till next time in Waseem world.

Wednesday, 29 October 2008

My Ummah

Alot has been said recently about the negatives of the recent Sami Yusuf concert. Alot has been said about music being haraam, and this specific brand of music being more haraam than other seemingly worse vices. But I have decided to focus on the positives and bring to light the bright side and benefits I have received from the concert.

  • The concert has got me listening to Islamic music, and really appreciating and enjoying it.
  • The concert and the music has given me a spiritual boost that has gotten me through a tough couple of days.
  • The road trip was a good bonding experience.
  • At the best of times, the concert was an amazing and unique zikr.
  • I got to meet a few blogger friends again. Saaleha, who looked radiant, Nooj, who looked taller, BB, who looked shorter.
  • Listening to the car radio, I find myself making Zikr and sending Durood.
Here's the lyrics of my current favorite Sami Yusuf song. Pertinent to the post in a few ways.

My Ummah by Sami Yusuf

My ummah, my ummah
He will say
Rasulullah on that day
Even though we've strayed from him and his way

My brothers, my sisters, in Islam
Let’s struggle, work, and pray
If we are to
Bring back the glory of his way

CHORUS:
Ya Allah ya rabbal ‘alamin
Ya rahmanu ya rahim
Ya rabbi

Let the Ummah rise again
Let us see daylight again
Once again

Let’s become whole again
Proud again
’Cause I swear with firm belief in our hearts
We can bring back the glory of our past

My ummah, my ummah
He will say
Rasulullah on that day
Even though we strayed from him and his way

Look at where we were
And look at where we are
And tell me
Is this how he’d want it to be?
Oh no! Let us bring back our glory

CHORUS

Till next time in Waseem world.

Tuesday, 21 October 2008

Pushing Daisies

I was intrigued by the premise of the show Pushing Daisies even before I saw the show.

Pushing Daisies centers on the life of Ned, a pie-maker gifted with the mysterious ability to bring dead things back to life by touching them. There are a couple of conditions to this somewhat unwanted talent, however. Ned quickly learns that if something is revived for more than exactly one minute, something of similar "life value" in the vicinity drops dead, as a form of balance. Additionally, if he touches the revived thing a second time, it falls dead again, this time permanently.
From Wikipedia

When I watched the show, the main attraction was its charm. The show just seems to be more colorful and cheerful than anything I have watched recently. The aspect I enjoy the most is the using of Ned's powers to solve murder cases. As the saying goes 'Dead men tell no tales' but CSI has altered this belief somewhat. Pushing Daisies takes it a bit further. In Pushing Daisies, the victim is actually questioned to assist the investigation. Usually they are unaware of their assailant and not much can be communicated in a minute, but it is an enjoyable minute nonetheless.

I wondered to myself if I could bring back to life any person (recently dead) for just 1 minute who would i choose? The first person that came to mind was ... Heath Ledger. Maybe the conversation would go something like this...

*touch* Hey Heath, I loved you as the Joker, I didn't really expect you to be better than Jack Nicholson...You're welcome, so why did you do it? The overdose?...Oh yeah, must be a tough life, Oscar nominee, lead in the 2nd biggest money maker of all time ... Yup, didn't beat Titanic though. Can you say 'Why so serious' for me one time?...Ok, thanks, bye.*touch*

Till next time in Waseem world.

Monday, 13 October 2008

Goldilocks and the Three Bears

I think when we are children we take everything for face value. That is probably the greatest blessing of being a child, lack of cynicism i.e. innocence. That is the reason kids should not rush to grow up. As you grow older you begin to doubt and suspect and poke fingers at, to the point of which, some people even resent other peoples innocence.

Anyway ... back to my point of taking stuff at face value ... We never analyzed the fairytales and nursery rhymes that we read. Well I know I never did. Recently I was thinking about Goldilocks and the Three Bears (don't ask why) and there were some things I realised. I'm sure everyone has read the story and know it quite well. If you haven't ... Wow, your parents must not have loved you too much. Anyway here is a link to a succint version of the story.

Here is my grownup analysis of Goldilocks

  • Goldilocks was a very intrusive person, as well as very fussy, she must have been Indian.
  • Why didn't Mother Bear make one pot of porridge instead of 3 different bowls? The different heat suggests they were made at different times.
  • Goldilocks must have been really fat to break the Baby Bears chair.
  • Mother Bear and Father Bear must have been having marital problems, considering they were sleeping on separate beds.
  • Those bears had horrible reaction time. She had time to jump up and scream Help and run away and they didn't do anything.
  • Bears can't talk.
Till next time in Waseem world.

Tuesday, 7 October 2008

The Monkeysphere

We were at the graveyard on Eid Day, and we met a guy we knew. After exchanging greetings, my cousin, Aadil asks him where's his father. Guy says his father is in Richards Bay, with his granny, his granny who he says doesn't look like is gonna make the day. I took the news with a solemn look, I have never met his granny in my life. I didn't even know his granny was still alive for that matter. As we walk back up to the car, Hamza mumbles to me 'She isn't in our monkeysphere'.

'What? WTF is a monkeysphere?' I promptly asked Hamza.

'You see,' Hamza began. 'The size of a monkey's brain shows the size of the monkey groups the monkeys formed. The bigger the brain, the larger the group. On average they deduced that the group size was around 50. So basically any monkeys out of that 50, the monkey won't give a shit about.'

So I guess we don't have to worry about Planet of the Apes happening anytime soon, but it goes further.

Apparently the human brain has a monkeysphere of 150. So basically anyone out of that, we don't really care too much about. Hence since guy's granny was out of monkeysphere, her death meant/would mean nothing to us(still don't know if she is still alive).

You might be thinking "Hey, thats rubbish, I care about people. I march for Palestine etc." Well would you rather have your best friend/ love interest / brother die over a busload of Palestinians? Think about it.

I remember in Spiderman 1, in the movie, Green Goblin gives him a choice, busload of kids or Mary Jane. He chooses both, cos they had a huge kid following. In comic canon though when he was given choice he chose busload of kids and his love interest, Gwen Stacy, died. How many of us would make that choice? I know I wouldn't. I guess with great power comes great responsibility.

Joseph Stalin said "One death is a tragedy. One million deaths is a statistic." (They have this on loading screen of Call of Duty 2 when you die.)

Till next time in Waseem world.

Tuesday, 30 September 2008

Concerning MJ


This blog is endorsed by MJ, and if it were Gateway, he would order horrible Thai food at it, and if it were a Smackdown game, he would get beat down in it. The reader is now considered to be as awesome as MJ and enrolled into the people who MJ digs club. Happy Birthday son.

That picture sucks, but I was stuck trying to find a good one, I'm not very photogenic.

Random MJ fact : NMJ hall is named after MJ, no-one knows what the N stands for.



Till next time in Waseem world.

Monday, 29 September 2008

Eid Carol

On the first day of Ramadaan, my mother gave to me
A Puri Patha for Iftari.

On the second day of Ramadaan, my mother gave to me
Two Chana Puri
And a Puri Patha for Iftari.

On the third day of Ramadaan, my mother gave to me
Three Half Moon
Two Chana Puri
And a Puri Patha for Iftari.

On the fourth day of Ramadaan, my mother gave to me
Four Chicken Pies
Three Half Moon
Two Chana Puri
And a Puri Patha for Iftari.

On the fifth day of Ramadaan, my mother gave to me
Five Mince Samoosas
Four Chicken Pies
Three Half Moons
Two Chana Puri
And a Puri Patha for Iftari.

On the sixth day of Ramadaan, my mother gave to me
A mild case of indigestion
Five Mince Samoosas
Four Chicken Pies
Three Half Moons
Two Chana Puri
And I missed the night's Taraweeh.

I didn't wanna go on for too long, else it would get a bit boring, and also I was running out of savouries. Eid Mubarak everyone.

Till next time in Waseem world.

Tuesday, 16 September 2008

Riddle me this ...

A riddle I found on the net, while I try to come up with another post. Try not to google.

Ten soldiers dressed in white, dead on the field, killed by three eyes, black as night.

What happened?

And here's one I got from parasputin.

Knowing there was no-one home, the caretaker of an apartment building called the police and the (sole) tenant to attend because he heard crashes coming from one of the apartments.
The police and the resident entered the apartment to find the bodies of Romeo and Juliet on the floor. The door was locked from the inside, and the only clues to be seen were broken glass and water on the floor. Nothing was out of place in the apartment other than the bodies.

What happened?

Till next time in Waseem world

Thursday, 11 September 2008

Current addictions

I have been tagged by Zahira and Khadija to do this current addictions post. To be honest I don't think I have any addictions, maybe a few things I do obsessively, which maybe could be classified as addictions. The other problem is, while couple maybe considered current, the others aren't but I will ignore this fact since Nooj chose sleep and Khadija chose procrastination, they definitely are not current.

1. Gmail Mobile - I check my mail on my phone almost every other hour when I'm away from my PC. It's not like I get lots of mail, just some obsessive thing that I do, it's become a habit. Maybe this can be classified as an addiction.

2. Plurk (Mobile and on the net) - For some reason I didn't feel like doing the twitter thing, it never appealed to me. For some reason I really like plurk, I have no reason, but it does seem better than twitter in my opinion.

3. Going through old messages - I tend to go through old emails, smses and messages as a way of reminiscing, it isnt so much an addiction but once I start, I can't seem to stop.

4. Sleep - Ok I'm borrowing this one from nooj, but my reason is different, I love sleep cos I can dream, and dreams allow me to do stuff I can't do in reality.(like fly)

5. Blogs - They seem to have gone off the boil a bit now, but there are some good new(read: recently found) blogs, and couple of my favorites are still going strong.

This is the part where I tag people, but instead of tagging people in hopes of them doing it, I'm just gonna use the tag as way of birthday greetings, cos I know these people are not likely to do this tag.

I tag !joe! (Happy Birthday!), R (Hers is towards end of the month), Delon (The guy who started me on blogging), MJ (The guy who has kept me blogging).

Till next time in Waseem world

Monday, 8 September 2008

Ramadaan E-card (updated)

Saaleha's now incredibly popular post inspired me to create an e-card of my own. My Char Knight was still in a fledgling stage, so I didn't want to push it down, cos people tend not to read older posts for whatever reason that is. And since my fasting brain seems unable to string sufficient sentences together, I decided to post this up. Maybe I will be plagiarised too. A guy can dream.

I had some time to come up with couple more.




And for all you MJ fans, heres a couple he came up with and sent to me.







Till next time in Waseem world

Monday, 1 September 2008

The Coveted

There they were, sitting neatly in a pile, beside the newsletters and various other members of the pamphlet family. I know, in a few minutes, that will change. Their fate was predestined, another inevitability in this world. I give them a longing look, hoping against hope that one of them will be mine.

I walk into the mosque and look around for possible competition to the object of my affection. The mosque isn't full today, perhaps people will sidle in later. I will have to take that eventuality into consideration. A few of the patrons pass backward glances, I know where their gaze falls. The call to prayer sounds; the coveted lay forgotten.

The prayer ends, and my mind goes back to the coveted. I look behind me to see the rows of competitors filing out. Surely there will be none left for me, but I have to try nonetheless. An overly friendly brother cuts me off to embrace me. 'Who be hugging for Maghrib Salaah,' my somewhat ebonic subconscious ponders. Surely a distraction. Embracing brother must have an accomplice outside who is collecting one for him.

Embracing brother leaves. I slowly make my way to the back of the mosque with just a smidgen of hope. Alas there seem to be but only the cheap ones, the ugly cousins. I dejectedly look for the least ugly cousin. And there under the sea of read and discarded pamphlets, I find it. The Perfect Ramadaan Timetable (The tear each day kind).

-----

This is work of fiction but I do love finding those tear each day Ramadaan timetables.

Till next time in Waseem world.

Thursday, 21 August 2008

The Char Knight

Warning - This post contains spoilers. And yes I know MJ already did a Batman Parody, but he challenged me to do better after I critiqued his. Competition is the something something of something (can't remember the quote)

---------

Meeting of the Dons of Chatsworth, chaired by the Golden Jewellers Lani, Richou Singh.

Richou: Bra’s we gathered here today to chune where must hide all the crown and how we can dalla the Batman. Does anyone know who he is, so we can find out where he bly and chune his ma?

2 Cents Seelan: Ya bra, he vyed school with me, his house name is Batmendren, but everyone call him Batman for short.

Lucker Lesley: That don’t make sense ekse, why they don’t call him Batmen then?

2 Cents: It make cents bra, how your name Woolaganathan and we call you Lesley.

Richou: Enough ou’s, we need to work together and dalla him one time. Who got one plan?

Everyone is silent, cos they all skrik for the Batman. Suddenly this bra comes with span Kaajal in his eyes and white Huldi on his face, and red mendhi on his lips.

Joker: I got one plan ous, gee me half the crown I’ll chune you’ll how it vys.

Richou: Bra, who you? I chuned the ous at Savera to make the sign say only Dons must come.

Joker: I’m the Joker ekse, you never hear of me before?

Richou: I take out jokers when I play thunee. Anyway you said you got a plan. Chune chune.

Joker: Ha ha, bra you gee me half your money I’ll dalla Batman for you, and I’ll chune the plan.

Richou: How about I give 5 grand and new Samsung U700?

Joker: Ha ha, and I thought I was the Joker. Samsung’s ma. Gee me one Nokia N95 8gig ekse.

Richou: No stock. Ok check yer, I’ll give you quarter the crown, half loaf beans bunny and Liverpool shirt from Workshop fleamarket.

Joker: OK shot, here’s the plan.

Span stuff happens, one two ous vret, and Joker chune he will kill more ous if Batman don’t come. So this bra Harvey Dent (Pragasen) chune he Batman, but it’s a setup and they catch the Joker, but his ous manage to kidnap Rachel (Devagie) Dawes, Batmans stekkie, and Harvey Dent (Pragasen), his bra, but he also Devagie’s outie, it’s a love triangle like Kuch Kuch. So Batman vy to work Joker for him to chune where he hiding them.

Batman: Joker, where you hiding Devagie and Pragasen and all, chune before I bust you up. Hold me back, Hold me back.

Joker: Ekse, I know wheres Devagie and I know wheres Pragasen but I don’t need this all and all?

Batman: Oh ya you. So what you saying Dad, you know where they are?

Joker: You check it’s like this, you know Naidoo’s tuckshop, you come by this one right, right? Don’t take that right, take the next right, right? Then vy straight until you come by one jackfruit tree. Then vy back little bit and take your left, right? And Devagie is by the posse next to the Litchis tree.

Batman: Oh Selvan’s posse. And Pragasen?

Joker: That ou parking by on the roof of Chatsworth Main. But chune me, why you smaak that Devagie so much? Her face like one bulldog.

Batman: I smaak for the big ones, you know how it is.

Joker: Oh ya you.

Batman chune his bra Gordon vy save Pragasen and he will vy save Devagie, cos he scheme might get some action. But when he get to Selvans posse, he find Pragasen there and look like someone lit one Indian King by his face. By the time Gordon get to Chatsworth Main, Devagie gets blown up, cos Gordon stopped to buy airtime. Gordon feels swak so he vys to check Pragasen in the hospital.

Gordon: Hey Pregs, how’s it vying?

Pragasen: Gordon chune me plain down how it look?

Gordon: Bra it looks tops, I think I’m gonna burn my face too, it be like the new style.

Pragasen: Gordon, chune me waar or I’ll rub my burnt face on you.

Gordon: Eew. Ok! Ok! It look like one puri one side and patha on the other side.

Pragasen looks bit mal but parks dom little while, then he asks Gordon.

Pragasen: Gordon, chune me what they used to call me back when I was internal affairs? And for waar, or Sathima I’ll wipe my face full on your white shirt.

Gordon: Burnt Face Preggie.

Meanwhile Joker doing one two swak things, and everyone getting skrik and wanna kick it from the city on couple boats.

Joker: This announcement sponsored by Nalis silk saris. Bra’s the boats got one two bombs, and on the boats there are one two detonators if you’ll press it I’ll let you’ll live.

The ous find the detonators and press it but the boats get blown up.

Joker: Ha ha, I popped those ou’s. I’m the don.

Batman finds Joker and chunes him swak at the top of the tower.

Batman: Ey, why you dallaed those ous swak and vat my stekkie too, I’m gonna work you now.

Joker: Bra, I did you a favour, even stekkie’s bru look better than her.

Batman: Ya that’s what you think. Take you madar.

Batman bust Joker up and tie him up, but then he get sms. Please call PREGYGOTMYLITY at 0705346781. No address nothing but he vys to check out Selvan’s posse cos that’s where all the action is.

Pragasen: Batman, its your fault Devagie is dead, for that sake I’m gonna rub my face on this lighty.

Batman: Pregs, loss the lighty, and lets speech fair fair.

They start speeching and vy close to one bank, and Gordon checks them and tries to break it up.

Gordon: Squash the speech, squash the speech.

Batman: Hold me back, hold me back

As Gordon pulls Batman back, Pragasen loses balance and falls to his death.

Batman: Haha that ou caught a drop.

Then he hears the kerels.

Batman: Eish, the polices, lemme vy, sight you Gordon.

Gordon: Ok lucker, ey bra I’m breaking that Batman sign thing, my light bill cameway lot last month.

Batman: Ok, shot.


---------

Till next time in Waseem world.

Monday, 18 August 2008

Top 10 Movies (Circa 2005-2008)

MJs movie list for the best 10 movies for the last 4 years (2005-2008) was crap, so I decided to blog my list to show him all the movies he missed out on. My judging criteria has entertainment value featuring highly, while good story and dialogue also very important. Im sure MJ and definitely Hamza wont agree with my list, but their ma :). I shortlisted 25 great movies, I struggled to decide a couple but my top 5 were set in stone.

10. Pick of Destiny

I didn't watch this movie till a couple months ago, but I have been singing the songs ever since, to the irritation of some friends even. The best musical I have seen since Little shop of Horrors.

9. 300

This was actually going to be Juno when I started this post last week, but I changed my decision when I thought about both these movies individually, and I was more out of 300. Juno's dialogue was awesome, only Kiss Kiss Bang Bang's dialogue was better from recent movies that I have seen but 300 visually and action-wise and overall entertainment-wise was much better.

8. Lil Miss Sunshine

Lil Miss Sunshine can be described as a dark comedy, yet it had amazing charm and cleverness. The premise of the story is very well put together and put across.

7. Madagascar

When I first watched this movie I thought it was OK, but when I watched it again I marvelled at the little bits I missed on first watch, and on third viewing I found more tidbits of humor (especially by the lemur-like things). This movie gets better on every watch and is now one of my favorite animated movies of all time.

6. Get Smart

This movie is the funniest spy movie I've seen since the Austin Powers movies. I feared maybe another Johnny English but Steve Carrell really pulled through and Anne Hathaway was gorgeous.

5. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang

Coolest, cleverest movie. I mentioned it before on my blog as one of the best movies you may have never seen. If you like quick-witted dark comedies with an element of suspense KKBB is the pinnacle of that genre.

4. The Dark Knight

Great story and a Joker who will probably go down as best villain in recent memory. Heath Ledger surpassed Jack Nicholson, that is as a great a compliment as I can give.

3. 40 year old Virgin

Best comedy of the last 5 years at the very least.

2. Stardust

Stardust is the perfect amalgamation of romance, fantasy, adventure and charm..

1. The Departed

To coin a phrase 'This movie was Don!'

Till next time in Waseem world.

Tuesday, 12 August 2008

It's all R&B to me

Listening to East Coast Radio is like going to a Debs Ball, most of the time. Slow, back in the day songs we have long forgotten and for good reason. It has its plusses though because it carries with it a wave of nostalgia. The rest of the time however they play R&B.

Does anyone remember what R&B supposed to stand for? Cos now its more like Random & Brainless. I probably am guilty of grouping all rubbish songs together so it's all R&B to me. To me, lyrics are the most important part of songs, something R&B seems to totally disregard.

Here are some of the worst lyrics I have had the misfortune of hearing.

50 Cent - 21 Questions

I love you like a fat kid loves cake

Maybe he loves her alot when he has her but when she is gone, he regrets the relationship. Deep.

Shakira - Whenever, Wherever

Lucky that my breasts are small and humble
So you don't confuse them with mountains

Maybe I should excuse cos English isn't her first language but then why does she sing in it. She has also other nonsensical songs like 'Underneath your skin'.

Gwen Stefani - Sweet Escape

Cause I've been acting like sour milk all on the floor
It's your fault you didn't shut the refrigerator

Maybe that's the reason I've been acting so cold?


Gwen Stefani used to rock with No Doubt, well I liked Don't Speak, and she is married to one of the great rockers of our generation, Gavin Rossdale of Bush. So can someone tell me why she has lost her mind?

Jimmy Soul - Happy for the rest of your life

If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty women your wife

Ya ... you do that and tell me how it works out for you.

Beyonce - Check on it

Dip it, pop it, twork it, stop it, check on me tonight

I'm not sure if I blogged this before, but I hate Beyonce. Her voice, the way she looks, her attitude, her perfume line, everything. I could have chosen a number of lyrics for her, but this was first one that came to mind. What the hell is a twork?

Sean Paul - Temperature

Gal don't say me crazy now, this strange love it a no Bridgette and Flava show..
Time fi a make baby now so stop gwaan like you a act shady yo...

I copied all these lyrics straight from azlyrics.com, so thats how he actually sings. Why is this guy famous? Noone can understand what he is saying, but maybe it is a small mercy we can't . There is a character in GTA4, Lil Jacob, who talks similarly. He is endearing. This is not. Only thing he is good for is parody.

Till next time in Waseem world.

Thursday, 7 August 2008

Batman bandwagon



Dedicated to Hamish 'Shah Rukh' Pillay for the outstanding achievement of winning the Citizen Book Prize. He was even in the paper. First Top Billing, now this. This man is going places, with his red shirt.

Congrats Hamish.

Till next time in Waseem world.

Monday, 4 August 2008

A turning tide ...

Poor men have it

Rich men need it

It is more evil than the devil

It is greater than God

If you eat it, you will die.

What is it?

I will delete all correct guesses, if you already know the answer, don't spoil it for everyone. This riddle is not of my own creation, I received it in a mail, and decided to post it. Bonus point if you can guess where the title is from, it is an additional clue.

Till next time in Waseem world.

Thursday, 31 July 2008

Take me away

My attempt at 'flash fiction', it is alot shorter than MJ's prescribed 600 words, and title and end could use some real work. There are three of mandated pop culture references, scattered subtly in the story. I will point them out if it's needed. So for MJ and whoever else who wishes to participate the restrictions will be at least one pop culture reference, less than 600 words, must not have profanity or sexually suggestive themes and ... I can't think of the restriction to add right now, will add later.

-------

His thoughts filtered back to her, just her, nothing else seemed important enough to be thought about. He dwelt on every word she had said to him, even those not meant for him seemed to have some hidden meaning for him. Re-contextualising the shards of memories brought a smile to his face.

'Hey Jimmy.' It was Pete. Pete the Feet. So named because of his unique ability to smell of feet at all times of the day.'You waiting for your girlfriend, Jimmy?' asked Pete, annoyingly dragging his words. 'Pete, I think you need to go over there and count something.' said Jimmy, offhandedly.

He stood there waiting for what seemed an eternity. The one lesson above all else she had taught him was patience, he seemed he was always waiting for her, even it was for just a glimpse. He looked back at the doorway, and almost as if he willed her to walk through, she suddenly appeared, walking towards him.

And then she was next to him, putting her hand in his. The simple contact sent a trill of excitement down his spine. He made a silent wish, to whoever it was that listened to wishes, that this moment could last forever. 'Ah, Jimmy! Miss Havisham!' And the moment was over. 'Jimmy being a good boy for you, Miss Havisham?'

'Of course Mrs Dean, James is my favorite. Bye James, remember to do your homework.'

-------

Till next time in Waseem world

Thursday, 24 July 2008

And the winner is ...

This post started off much differently yesterday. There was no real finality on who would be the winner, cos Saaleha was being diplomatic as ever and I was not sure how I was going to give the prize to nobody. So I considered making my life easier and giving the prize to a runner up but I decided instead to do the honorable thing and request Anonymous to claim his/her entry.

I was honestly surprised at the number and quality of the entries. I would like to firstly thank everyone who participated. We got about 10 entries and most of them were really funny, but one entry, at the real death of the competition, clinched the award of Purple Prose Pro.

That entry was ...

His eyes were automatically drawn towards her, like a blood covered man lying on the road after a car crash. His palms felt sweaty, his heart raced-the only other time he had felt this way was when his flatulence needed to be stifled. He opened his mouth to say Hi, but had forgotten about the Paan he had bit into an hour ago.

Honorable mentions to Parasputin and Mak(Muhammad) for their entries.

The winning entrant was previously thought to be Anonymous but has now identified herself as Morena. I would request Morena mail me her email address at gambit200@gmail.com so that I may mail her the prize.

Till next time in Waseem world.

Wednesday, 16 July 2008

8yr old me vs 25yr old me

I think as we age, we lose our optimism and we don't enjoy stuff as much as we used to. Like I went for an airshow on Sunday, I thought even though this is lame if I were younger it would be awesome. So here are my disparate takes on the airshow. There are few embellishments in my 8 year old version.

My Day At the Airshow

On Sunday we went to the airshow. It was lots of fun. I saw many helicopters and planes. We had a picnic. I ate pies and milktart. I also drank Coke. My favorite part of the airshow was when the cars raced the plane. The cars won. It was also funny when the big plane got stuck and the people had to push it. We also saw some people coming from the sky even a very old man. My daddy said the old man probably going to go back up to the sky very soon so he shouldn't have bothered. I'm not sure what daddy meant. I wanted to fall from the sky too but my mummy says they don't allow boys who don't eat all their vegetables. I don't like tomatoes :(


---------

To Airshow or not to airshow

I went for the airshow for the first time in years, and to be honest I wasn't that impressed. I wasn't really expecting much though. I came to realise an airshow is basically planes and helicopters flying from one end to another, sometimes they loop or attempt daring stuff (flying higher from side to side). They had a part where cars raced a plane, which the overenthusiastic announcer described as a once in a life thing, but it was such a big ass plane there was no way it had any hope of catching up with cars. Also was a bit where there were a few parachuters, that would have been exciting if you were actually participating. There was this old guy, about 80-something, they said it was his last jump, I wouldn't have been surprised if it was his last breath. Complaints aside, I had a really great time cos it is not what you do but who you do it with.

---------

Still taking entries for the competition, will close maybe end of this week, winning entry to be revealed next week.

P.S. I don't mind tomatoes.

Till next time in Waseem world.

Wednesday, 9 July 2008

It was a dark and stormy contest : The Purple Prose Pro

You would be excused if you didn't know who Bulwer-Lytton was, well you would be excused here, because I, myself, only found out what it meant yesterday from Saaleha. Lord Lytton was a popular writer in his day and coined many phrases that we use today viz. the pen is mightier than the sword. None so recognised though as 'It was a dark and stormy night', a phrase so despised by the writing fraternity, the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest was instantiated in it's 'honor'.

The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest (BLFC) is a tongue-in-cheek contest that takes place annually and is sponsored by the English Department of San José State University in San Jose, California. [Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bulwer-Lytton_Fiction_Contest]

So I came up with the idea, with Saaleha, that we should have one of these contests in the blogs. God knows some of us write so terribly at times, so we have the material. The winner will get a special prize that can't be explained in terms of monetary value. Here are a few winners and entries from the 2007 contest to get your brain ticking.

Gerald began--but was interrupted by a piercing whistle which cost him ten percent of his hearing permanently, as it did everyone else in a ten-mile radius of the eruption, not that it mattered much because for them "permanently" meant the next ten minutes or so until buried by searing lava or suffocated by choking ash--to pee.

Jim Gleeson
Madison, WI

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Danny, the little Grizzly cub, frolicked in the tall grass on this sunny Spring morning, his mother keeping a watchful eye as she chewed on a piece of a hiker they had encountered the day before.

Dave McKenzie
Federal Way, WA

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Mary had a little lamb; its fleece was Polartec 200 (thanks to gene splicing, a diet of force-fed petrochemical supplements, and regular dips in an advanced surface fusion polymer), which had the fortunate side effect of rendering it inedible, unlike that other Mary's organic lamb which misbehaved at school and wound up in a lovely Moroccan stew with dried apricots and couscous.

Julie Jensen
Lodi, CA

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The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife, not even a sharp knife, but a dull one from that set of cheap knives you received as a wedding gift in a faux wooden block; the one you told yourself you'd replace, but in the end, forgot about because your husband ran off with another man, that kind of knife.

Lisa Lindquist
Jackson, MI

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There was a pregnant pause-- as pregnant as Judith had just told Darren she was (about seven and a half weeks along), which was why there was a pause in the first place.

Tracy Stapp
Santa Ana, CA

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I was in a back alley in Fiji, fighting desperately and silently for my life, fighting desperately for oxygen, clawing at the calm and almost gentle pressure of the fabric held over my face by implacable, ebony thighs when I realized -- he was killing me softly with his sarong.

Karl Scott
Brisbane, Australia

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Racing through space at unimaginable speeds, Capt. Dimwell could only imagine how fast his spaceship was going.

Gary Smith
Florissant, CO

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You get the idea. There is only one rule: No plagiarism! All entries will be intensely Googled.

Rules Addendum: Basically your entry is allowed to be a paragraph of purple prose i.e. features exaggerated sentiment or extravagant and flowery language(Web definition). In the actual competition it has to be a sentence, preferably an intro sentence, but we don't need no stink'n rules, except the plagiarism one.

You may enter by comment or by email to me at gambit200@gmail.com or Saaleha at saaleha@gmail.com. Entries will be judged by Saaleha and I. Good Luck!

Till next time in Waseem world.

Thursday, 3 July 2008

It's not just about sex

As I commented on LLOs post 'Theory of housewives' earlier - 'This is a good topic, ...' So I would like to add my opinion in post form, if LLO doesn't mind.

As far back as a decade, I would say, it was still easy to live with having just a single breadwinner, for most families at least. But with the increasing costs of everything from school fees to bubblegum, I just don't think it is possible anymore. So working wives are more the norm these days than the exception.

For me, if my wife wanted to work, then it would be her choice, provided that does not hamper her duties towards the family. And this is a two-way thing. My job shouldn't affect my duties towards the family as well. I don't get why people believe that it's a wife's job to bring up the family and husband's job to bring money into the house. So with this ideology, they say 'It's fine, my wife can work, but she must still have time to do housework, look after kids etc.'.

In my un-experienced opinion, marriage is about compromise, it's not just about your rights, it is about mutual satisfaction in the decisions that you make. We had a great talk at the conference about marriage and basically, that like all things, marriage takes time and effort.

Till next time in Waseem world

Monday, 30 June 2008

Top 5 Animated Movie Songs

I don't really like musicals. Westside Story and Saturday Night Fever etc. isn't for me. There are only few musical movies I have really liked and would consider putting anywhere near my Top 50 movies of all time viz. Little Shop of Horrors and more recently, Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny. There are 2 movies, however, that are definitely in there, and if you think about them, they are just as musical (if not more). They are Aladdin and The Lion King, because they are animated, I guess we don't consider them as musicals. So when MJ did his list of sideline Disney characters, I said that's a crap idea, rather do a list of favorite Disney songs. He said F**k you, do that yourself. So that's what I am doing.

5. Hercules: Go the Distance - Michael Bolton

4. Toy Story: You've got a friend in me - Randy Newman

3. Lion King: Can you feel the love tonight - Elton John

2. Jungle Book: Bare Necessities - Who knows (they probably dead now)

1. Aladdin: Whole new world - Peabo Bryson and some other lady (I liked movie version better)

Till next time in Waseem world.

Friday, 27 June 2008

LOLlion

Iz in the jungle, talking to your sistaz


This is based on the phenomenon called Lolcats. One of my leftover Narnia pics, that didn't fit in with my Narnia story.

Till next time in Waseem world.

Saturday, 21 June 2008

Chronicles of Arabiya

When I watched Prince Caspian, the new Chronicles of Narnia movie, I noticed the Telmarines seemed to have a very Arabic look about them. That's all it takes for an idea to germinate in my head. Here's how the movie went on in my head. I got the pics from www.allmoviephoto.com.

I am Prince Caspian, I will lead the Telmarines into the new millennium. From Narnia to the Millennium.



We cannot follow you, you don't even keep a beard. Look at our Mashallah fist length beards. You are banished from Narnia for your disregard of the practices.



Your scorn and rebuke has led me to collude with Westerners, ghayr mahrams and short people. (No offense Haamish)


Astagfirullah! Ghayr Mahrams! Lower your gaze or die!



With my Mashallah beard protected, I will defeat you transgressor. Tonight you dine in Jahanam!



It's Asr time!



With my sawaab of reading a timeous Asr, I have managed to defeat you. Any last words?



Jihad!!!



Allahu Akbar!!!



Perhaps we should rethink this Jihad. Verily the Jihad of ones own self is the greater Jihad.



Allahu Alam


Till next time in Waseem world.

Tuesday, 17 June 2008

Ya Ayyuhal Blogger

Am i proud to be a Muslim? Yes! What do I do to display that pride though? Nothing really. I mean I don't have a beard, I don't wear a Kurtah all the time, I don't wear a hat to work besides Friday, I'm not a part of any charity organisation, in fact I don't really have that extensive an Islamic knowledge to be honest. Yes, I'm a good person and probably show to people that Islam isn't as bad as people make it out to be, but thats about it.

I went to an Islamic conference (From Medina to Millennium) over the weekend, and what was funny before I went to it is that I thought I would feel out of place. My reason being that my Islamic knowledge is very limited, everything I had learnt prior to couple years ago were through Friday Lectures and the basics in Madressah. Obviously this is my own fault so I attribute no blame to anyone for my ignorance.

The conference was incredibly different to what I expected, moreso because I have never been for any conference before. A conference it seems basically has speakers who come and speak on a set topic and afterwards people ask questions. I expected a more conventiony type thing, so luckily my lack of knowledge wasn't put to test.

I learnt alot and there were alot of mindset changes for me. I couldn't possibly discuss everything I learnt and I think alot of stuff was on a personal level, in terms of self realisation but there were 2 points that resonated with me through the weekend.

1. Humility of the true scholars and ambassadors of Islam
We met Zain Bhika on Friday before he went on stage for his concert. He was the star of the concert yet he spoke to us as equals and with respect. Not only us, but the volunteers who were there to assist him and tend to him.

The sheiks(shayukh it seems is the actual plural of this word) at the conference with their immense knowledge and power were incredibly humble. There are 2 specific people I would like to mention. Firstly, Sheik Salman al Ouda, the main speaker at the conference, whom I feel incredible honored to have seen. He earned the respect of everyone at the conference, I think, with his sensible and detailed answers and talks. Initially the language barrier was a problem but I think Sheik Abu Yusuf did a great job with his translations. Secondly is Dr Ashraf Nasser who after delivering an awesome talk went to sit in the audience as if he was just any ordinary person even though I'm sure the panel would have accepted him with open arms.

I think humility makes people more relatable. If you behave as if you're holier than thou, people are gonna treat you as such, and you don't earn respect, you are given status, which I believe is not the same thing.

2. Islam is wasted on some Muslims
You know that saying that 'Youth is wasted on the young', well similarly I think Islam is wasted on some Muslims i.e. some Muslims don't appreciate the beauty of Islam. It was obvious at the conference that some people seemed to have ulterior motives for being there, which led to the disrespect of the sheiks. If there was one message that resounded in the conference, it was one of brotherhood and unity and that we shouldn't look down on someone for their ideals, color, caste or nationality. Something that alludes the realisation of some people is that your Imaan(faith) is incomplete until you love for your Muslim brother what you love for yourself.

There was one question I wanted to ask regarding the views held by Shiites. Even though I didn't ask it I think I have my answer. We shouldn't argue about the 1% of issues makes us different but rather embrace the 99% that makes us the same and ... Allahu Alam.

Till next time in Waseem world

Tuesday, 10 June 2008

Zamilooni ... the sequel

My friend Delon asked me yesterday if my blog is solely used for the adaptation of lyrics. I said, it's not,they just seem to be the post ideas I have. This adaptation is not a parody or poking any fun, it is a sincere attempt at a sequel of sorts. Based on the lyrics 'We look for stories of love, in places dark and cold', I have adapted the lyrics to sorta pay homage to the love of Hazrat Fatima RA and Hazrat Ali RA. I'm not really sure it's all that good, but I tried to be historically accurate. I kept some of the original lyrics, cos it seems to fit in with my idea, and left the last bit (Qasidah Burdah) cos it compliments the original so well, it would feel incomplete without it.

Adapted from Zamilooni by Native Deen
He stepped towards the mosque, he knew he was sincere

The Prophet came with words from God, held with the highest revere
His friends persuaded him to go, that he had nothing to fear
Yet there was a trembling deep inside his heart, unsure of what will occur

There was only one woman for him
The Prophet knew for her, he was right
Light would be married to the light
Fatima would be his wife…

Chorus
He said Zamilooni, Zamilooni, Dathirooni, Dathirooni, (Envelop me, Embrace me)
A mighty task has come before me…
I need you here with me…
By my side…

She was a woman of humility, Syedatun Nisa al Alamin (Leader of the women of the worlds)
Many prominent men had asked for her, they were all turned away
But she accepted Hazrat Ali, one of the First, because of the beauty she saw in his soul
He was a light for her – so right for her – her life will now be whole

But he seemed to be so distressed, about the mehr he had to pay
But to make Fatima his wife, he would give even his armor away

Chorus

Bridge…
We look for stories of love, in places dark and cold
When we have a guiding light, for the whole world to behold
But we're so selfish in our ways, to the ones we hold so close
Our own pleasure and happiness is what we value most

But she gave him love and loyalty, and everything she had
And he honored her, they upheld each others faith,
when the times were bad, the times were bad...

Now years have passed, times have changed, since Fatima breathed her last.
And the Message of the one true God, was spreading far and vast
But when he cleansed her body and saw the mark, that Fatima had bore
His eyes began to swell with tears, his heart began to mourn

Cause she was there for him, when times were rough, and his friends were in doubt
She was a loving mother, a perfect believer, and a wife so devout

Chorus

Mawlaya salli wa sallim da’iman abada
'Ala habibika khayril khalqi kullihimi...(X4)
Rasullullah,Habiballlah,Shafiallah,Nabiallah

Till next time in Waseem world.

Monday, 9 June 2008

The Demon Code Prevents Me ...

The Beelzeboss scene in Tenacious D has to be one of my favorite scenes of all time, it just drips awesome. Perhaps I should do a favorite movie scene post, not today though.

I watched the movie (Pick of Destiny) twice in the last 2 weeks, and the song (Beelzeboss) seems to have super-glued itself onto my cranium. Not a very good thing, considering the lyrics, because when you're belting out 'Wait, Wait, wait you motherfucker!', people tend to stare. So I've decided to blog the lyrics and c-box them in order to flush it out.

Behold the awesomeness:

Warning: Lyrics has lots of profanity, avoid it if that isn't your thing


"Beelzeboss (The Final Showdown)"

Beelzeboss

[Beelz] I am complete!

[Both] Fuck!

[Beelz] yes you are fucked, shit out of luck
now I'm complete and my cock you will suck
This world will be mine and you're first in line
you brought me the pick and now you shall both die!

[JB] Wait! Wait! Wait!
you motherfucker
we challenge you to a rock off!
give us one chance to rock your socks off

[Beelz] Fuck, fuck, fuck
the demon code prevents me
from declining a rock off challenge
what are your terms? what is the catch?

[JB] If we win, you must take your sorry ass back to hell.
and also you will have to pay our rent

[Beelz] And what if *i* win?
[JB] then you can take Kage back to hell...
[KG] What?
[JB] trust me Kage, its the only way,
[KG] What the fuck are you talking about?
[JB] to be your little bitch.
[Beelz]
Fine! Let the rock off begin!ha ha
I'm the devil i love metal!
Check this riff it's fucking tasty
I'm the devil i can do what i want,
whatever i got I'm gonna flaunt,
there's never been a rock off that I've ever lost
i cant wait to take Kage back to hell
I'm gonna fill him with my hot demon gel
I'll make him squeal like my scarlet pimpernel

[JB] No!
c'mon Kage bring the thunder
[KG] there's just no way that we can win,
that was a masterpiece.
[JB] listen to me
[KG] he rocks too hard because he's not a mortal man
[JB] goddamn-it Kage,
he gonna make you his sex slave,
you're gonna gargle mayonnaise
unless we bust a massive monster mama-jam.
[KG] dude, we've been through so much shit,
[JB] deactivated lasers with my dick
[BOTH] now its time to blow this fucker down!
[JB] C'mon Kage now it's time to blow doors down
[KG] I hear you Jables now it's time to blow doors down
[JB] Light up the stage cause its time for a showdown
[KG] We'll bend you over then we'll take you around town
[BOTH] Now we've got to blow this fucker down
[KG] He's gonna rape me if we do not blow doors down
[JB] C'mon Kage cause it's time to blow doors down
[KG] Oh we'll piledrive ya, it's time for the smackdown
[JB] Hey anti-christ-er, Beelzeboss,
we know your weakness our rocket-sauce
we rock the casbah, and blow your mind
we will defeat you, for all mankind
you hold the scepter,
we hold the key
you are the devil,
we are the D [18x]

[Beelz]
You guys are fuckin' lame. Come on Kage, You're coming with me.
Taste my lightning fuckers!

[Tenacious D:]
[JB] NO!

[Beelz]
ow! Fuck!
My fuckin' horn!
oh no!

[JB] From whence you came you shall remain,
until you are complete again

[Beelz]
No! Fuck you Kage and Fuck you Jables!
I'll get you Tenacious D!

The funny thing about the movie is that even though every song has the words 'fuck' or 'suck cock' in it, you don't get any sense of vulgarity. I watched the movie with my parents in the room but I didn't feel awkward except for the bit when he deactivated lasers with his dick.

By the way, for the sake of it, Happy Birthday to Hamza and my sister Shaista for today. I would have dedicated a post to Hamza, but he isn't one for fanfare. He's like 'Argh! Presents! Argh! Cake! Argh! Birthday!'

Till next time in Waseem world

Thursday, 5 June 2008

10 things that suck about blogs

1. Evil anonymous commentors
Although I don't seem to get them, my friends' blogs seem to have an abundance of them, especially MJ, R and Haamish. Guys who seem to think they can live your life better than you. I think they do it just to get a reaction but they can be hurtful at times.

2. Copy and Paste
There is nothing wrong with copying stuff as long as you quote your source, else it becomes something people like to call Plagiarism. We post in the 'bullshit' blog, stuff that we find, but we don't claim it to be our own. There is no point in having a blog if you're just gonna plagiarise other peoples ideas and/or work.

3. Guys who use blogs as way to flirt
A girl will write a weak 5 line post and you'll get few comments along the lines of 'omg thats so true' or 'lol you got talent'. I wonder if they really think the blogger is going to fall in love with them over their comments.

4. Overly fancy
Blogs that aren't worth the loading time to read. Some of the widgets are cool, but to have every widget known to blog is a bit excessive.

5. Pink
Pink blogs suck.

6. Word Verification
A waste of time, I usually have to type the code again cos the first time doesn't register.

7. Egocentric
Bloggers who think they are god's gift to blogging and know better than you.

8. Lol Commentors
People who comment for the sake of it, never offering anything constructive or creative. These guys are harmless though, at least they have no hidden agenda.

9. Identity theft
People who act like they are someone else. I'm not sure why they do this, maybe they think its funny. It doesn't happen too often though. Seems to mostly affect Haamish.

10. People who take themselves too seriously
People who think their problems are the worst the world has ever faced or everything is about them. E.g. my cat ran away, i think it hates me.

Till next time in Waseem world