Tuesday, 31 March 2009

Waseem's Ever Great Food tour of JHB 2009

I have recently lost the urge to blog and I thought to myself I'm over this blogging thing and I have found much more enjoyment in blogging Almost News than the recent inane meme blogs. 

I resolved to let my blog go, but after I received my recent Sitemeter and it informed me that I have on average, 240 visitors a week, I thought it be pretty lousy for them to be greeted by the same crappy posts. So this is an attempt to revive The Ever Great Waseem.

My recent JHB trip was good. Filled with good food, lots of driving, getting lost couple times as well as meeting old and new friends. The food was a real highlight, who knew JHB had such great food joints? Maybe you did but not me. (And who says food joints? Me, apparently.)

So I present to you: Waseem's Ever Great Food tour of JHB 2009

1. Chuckleberrys

Chuckleberrys was the venue for our infamous blogger meet, highly publicised and sparsely attended. I'm not complaining though cos I got to meet 2 of my best blogger friends (who, I think,  have been more than just blogger friends for quite a while) and 2 of my favorite plurk buddies. What is plurk you ask? Exactly! Anyway this isn't a blog meet post, it's a food tour post. The menus were unnecessarily heavy, and food choices were vast. I finally settled on sauteed mushroom burger, hoping they had mushrooms and burgers cos for some reason they didn't have much other ingredients, including curry and banana, and other stuff I don't remember. I also ordered a choc fudge milkshake, while Hamza bravely ordered the peanut butter milkshake, and so did Saaleha, in fact their orders were exactly the same. It was like rain on a wedding day. (Actually it wasn't cos it was a coincidence not irony. I just wanted to say rain on a wedding day, which is also not irony.)

The burger was ok, I had a lightweight one, compared to Naeem's middleweight one, which was huge. I think for the price, Wimpy is better, or even McD's for that matter. The milkshake was lousy, so was the peanut butter one, which I tasted from Hamza. You want a great milkshake? Have McD's strawberry milkshake. You remember me talking about great food joints at beginning of post, this wasn't one of them. 

2. Groom's House

 You know when you go to an Indian house, you HAVE to eat. There is no choice. Especially when they set a whole tressel just for you, holding up all other arrangements. The menu was Kalia and Soji, typical Khatham food. I couldn't stomach any Kalia, considering the ok burger, so I just had some Soji. Soji was good, not too granular, not too sweet, not too oily, just right. I got away with just looking at the Kalia and sipping Cooee Iron Brew thoughtfully.

3. The Wedding

At the wedding, I fell in love. With the dessert tray. I told Hamza, we should bide our time though, dessert would be all the sweeter at the end of the meal. The meal comprised of sweet rice, which I find rather stupid in concept, and chicken biryani. Biryani, alas with basmathi rice. Some people like basmathi rice, I have no idea why, it is an even more stupid concept than sweet rice. I ate my meal with little relish, looking all the more forward to my dessert. We finished our meal and went to wash our hands, and Hamza went outside to smoke, while I gave him company. On our return, disaster struck! Our beautifully assembled dessert tray lay almost barren, pillaged save for few enticing ice cream cupcakes and some healthy-looking fruit cupcakes. We looted the last remnants of the dessert tray, looking longingly, at the immaculately concieved cupcakes and triple choc mousse things of our fellow diners. The ice cream cupcake thing was nice, and the Bar One swiss roll, but it really was a case of what might have been.

4. Spill the Beans

Rather than be assailed by another round of basmathi biryani, we managed to escape the groom's house once more, and our destination was premeditated. Spill the Beans. Pizza.

I knew very little about this place, except for that they served pizza and coffee. The setting was that of a coffee shop, very trendy, if I used the word sheek, I would have said sheek. We ordered a couple of large pizzas, don't remember the names, but they were delicious. Easily the best pizza I've eaten in a long while. The remarkable thing were the hot chocolates we ordered, not the most delicious (Wimpy makes the best far as I'm concerned), but they had these amazing designs on the froth using hot chocolate syrup. It was the food joint of the food tour.

5. Schlotzsky's

Schlotzsky's - funny name, serious sandwich. We had this at Sandton City, I ordered a club sandwich. The best sandwich I've ever eaten. I regret giving half mine to Hamza. I think Subway is overrated, they have great bread choices though. We capped off our JHB eating tour with chocolate minibon. Tasted the same as the one in Durban. I wanted to try Haagen Daz, but it was R21 a scoop, and I was like Fuck that.

We also had Wrap It Up on the way home, but that it was in Harrismith so that is excluded from the Ever Great Food Tour. Sorry Wrap It Up. Thems the rules.

Till next time in Waseem world

Monday, 9 March 2009

Do you know the story about the Zen master?

I watched Charlie Wilson's War yesterday, and I thought it was a really great movie, and I'm not even that into politics usually. There was one scene especially that I enjoyed.

The scene goes like this
Gust Avrakotos: Listen, not for nothing, but do you know the story about the Zen master and the little boy?
Rep Charlie Wilson: Oh is this something from [name inaudible] the Greek witch of Aliquippa, Pennsylvania?
Gust: Yeah as a matter of fact it is.
“There’s a little boy. Now on his 14th birthday he gets a horse, and everybody in the village says “How wonderful the boy got a horse,” and the Zen master says “We’ll see.”
“Two years later the boy falls off the horse, breaks his leg, and everybody in the village says “How terrible,” and the Zen master says “We’ll see.”
“Then a war breaks out and all the young men have to go off and fight, except the boy can’t cause his leg’s all messed up, and everybody in the village says “How wonderful”…
Charlie: Now the Zen master says “We’ll see.”
Gust: So you get it?
Charlie: No. No, cause I’m stupid…
Gust: You’re not stupid, you’re just in Congress.
(To put rest of the dialogues in context I have to tell you they are celebrating their victory over the Soviet Union in Afghanistan)
Gust: Start with the roads, move on to the schools, restock the sheep herds, give ‘em jobs, give ‘em hope.
Charlie: I’m trying.
Gust: “Try harder”
Charlie: I took you from five million to a billion. I broke this ice on this thing [something] - I got a Democratic congress in lockstep behind a Republican president -
Gust: That’s not good enough. Because I am about to hand you a code-word classified NIE [national intelligence estimate] right now and it’s gonna tell you that the crazies have started rolling into Kandahar like it’s a f’ing bathtub drain.
Charlie: Jesus, Gust, you could depress a bride on her wedding day.
Gust: Hey. Listen to what I’m telling you.
(they hug)
Charlie: You did a hell of a job for the son of a soda pop maker.
Gust: “We’ll see.”


Till next time in Waseem world.

Monday, 2 March 2009

Boredom, thy name is this tag

Finish the sentence..........

Finish the sentence survey - your turn!
Paste the sentences into a note of your own, change the ... to your answers, then tag awesome people to use it as filler posts

Finish The Sentence Survey

1. My ex... is non-existent. Existentialism is a funny thing.

2. Maybe I should... rethink what i write in the next sentence.

3. I love... big butts, I cannot lie. (Not really, this is just lyrics from a dumb song)

4. People would say that I'm... sweet, but I have a mean sense of humor

5. I don't understand... racism, or any other kind of bigotry for that matter

6. When I wake up in the morning... I snatch at dissolving images of my previous nights dreams.

7. I lost... 30 Kgs. Ask me how. (Does anyone actually fall for this?)

8. Life is full of... amazing moments, it's about making those moments last.

9. My past is... passed. I can only look to the future. 

10. I get annoyed when... my friends are trod on.

11. Parties are... not very consequentual in Waseem's world.

12. I wish... Almost News was better received. 

13. Dogs... are not my best friend

14. Cats... was this broadway show

15. Tomorrow... never dies.

16. I have... no debt.

17. If I had a million dollars… I would be sleeping right now

18. I'm totally... over this tag.

I tag noone, this tag was boring. (yawn)

Till next time in Waseem world.